Lee and his wife opened their home and their family, to children who needed more than a temporary place to stay. This is what that commitment looks like from the inside.
a family who was ready
Before fostering, Lee and his wife were already a family of five, two parents and five daughters. Fostering had been on their minds for a long time, but Lee had concerns. “We thought with my age and my diabetes it might be a problem,” he says, “but we looked into it and it wasn’t.” With that reassurance, they started the process.
From the beginning, it was a family decision. They spoke with all of their children about what fostering would mean, and every one of them was on board. From there, Lee and his wife thought carefully about the types of fostering that would work best for everyone involved.
why long-term?
With two younger daughters still at home and three older daughters and grandchildren also in the picture, stability mattered. Not just for the children they would foster, but for their whole family.
“We didn’t want the constant change of children bonding and then having to leave,” Lee explains. “We thought long-term was best for us and we wanted to give children the opportunity to have a real family life.”
That commitment runs deep. Lee and his wife are clear with every child they welcome: this is their home, not just for now, but for life, even beyond their 18th birthday. “They are now part of our family.”
“We tell them this is their home, not just for a while, but for life.”
what long-term fostering actually looks like
In day-to-day life, long-term fostering means watching children grow. It means them gaining extra family members, forming real relationships, and finding stability in a home where they feel safe and secure. It means supporting them through their education, helping them build life skills, and being there for the milestones that matter.
“It is so rewarding to see and know you’re making a change in a child’s life,” says Lee. As for the impact on the house itself, Lee doesn’t feel it much. “It’s always been a busy house. You don’t really think about it. You just see the rewards in how happy all the children are.”
celebrating milestones
Some of the proudest moments have come quietly, over time. Lee has watched one of his children go all the way from primary school to high school, and seen them work through real struggles along the way. “They had their challenges with trauma and slowly came through it with help and support from us and professionals. Now they’re doing excellent in school and preparing for exams.”
But it’s the simpler moments that stay with him too. “Taking them on their first family holiday abroad, watching them just be a child, happy without a care in the world for a couple of weeks, that is so rewarding.”
the honest challenges
Long-term fostering is not without its difficulties. Supporting children through trauma is one of the biggest, helping them process their life experiences, which can show up in many different ways. And getting the right professional help when it’s needed can sometimes be a challenge in itself.
There is also the everyday reality of parenting. “Other challenges are just normal growing up, becoming teenagers,” Lee says with honesty. “Sometimes it’s hard to identify what is trauma and what is just being a teenager, depending on the young person.”
what family means
“Family, to all of us, means home, belonging, and feeling safe and secure.” That is what Lee and his wife want every young person in their care to experience. Not as a guest, not as a placement, but as someone who belongs.
One of their current foster children is Polish, and the family has made a real effort to honour that. “They help us understand their culture and food, we don’t make them adapt to ours,” Lee says. “We have special Polish days. Sometimes they want to mark them, sometimes they don’t, we just follow their lead. We’re very open.”
“Family means home, belonging, and feeling safe and secure.”
what lee would say to someone thinking about it
For Lee, long-term fostering has given children something that every child deserves, a sense of home, a feeling of safety, and the chance to just be a child who is loved and cared for. “Sometimes it’s also a sense of relief for them,” he adds, “to finally start that long road ahead, knowing they are secure.”
His message to anyone considering it is simple: the stability you offer, the long-term relationships, the life skills, the family, is everything. “You are making a change in that child’s life. And when you see them, picking up new hobbies, exceeding in school, when they weren’t doing so well when they first joined your family, there is nothing better than that.”
If Lee’s story has resonated with you, you can read more experiences from foster carers in Wrexham on our success stories page, or find out more about who can foster and what the journey involves.
