caring for siblings
At Foster Wales Wrexham we understand how important it is for siblings to stay together when they are needing to be cared for. We always need people who can foster siblings.
it can be challenging
Caring for foster children can be a challenge, however, it can be especially difficult for the children & young people being placed in foster care. Picture yourself being told you cannot remain where you are currently living, that you need to be cared for by people that you don’t know and that your siblings for whatever reason, cannot come with you.
they feel more secure
When you foster siblings, they often settle into their new surroundings much better. They can feel more secure when placed together and less worried about their siblings. They can comfort and support each other during a highly emotional, stressful and difficult time. It can also provide a better sense of identity and belonging.
keeping them together
When siblings enter the care system, the decision of whether to place them together or separately is of vital importance. It is very important that we keep them together whenever possible.
Our research shows that children are far more likely to settle and start making positive development if they are kept with their siblings, especially if they have a strong emotional connection.
These crucial relationships are better able to thrive by the fact that they can assist one another and exchange experiences.
This decision can have lifelong consequences in terms of whether these children will grow up knowing each other or not.
Children entering the care system are likely to have to go and live in surroundings that are very unfamiliar to them. Most siblings will be placed with a foster family who are previously unknown to them and whose household rules and routines are unfamiliar to them. The carer may have no previous knowledge of what food they like, what things scare them, and whether they have a particular soft toy that they like to have with them at bedtime.
The presence of a sibling can provide a great deal of reassurance. While not all siblings have close relationships, the presence of a sibling in the same placement can provide a trusted presence to share anxieties with, and a point of familiarity amid so much else that is strange and unfamiliar.
sadly, this is not always possible.
This can be the case if the family group is too big or if there is a large age gap. Sometimes it’s safer to keep siblings apart by placing them with different foster families due to sibling rivalry.
Another factor is the shortage of foster carers with sufficient space in their homes to accommodate two or more children from the same family.
We provide specialised training to all of our foster carers who care for sibling groups to help them support the children to the best of their abilities.
“In our years of fostering, we have taken care of a few sibling groups, which has been incredibly rewarding. They arrive at our home understandably anxious and scared, and they can sometimes want to sleep in the same bed for comfort & reassurance. As they watch each other, especially when one has been the primary caregiver, they quickly learn to trust one another. It’s lovely to see the siblings beginning to unwind and seeking solace from us, and the child who has been the caregiver becoming a child once more. Because the siblings are now both able to be children—and they may have other siblings—contact with those siblings is crucial as well. It’s fantastic to see them gain such confidence, several of the siblings we fostered are now parents too.
We were told by a sibling group that left us many years ago, “Do you remember when we went on holiday, do you remember when I learned to ride my bike, etc? Do you remember the parting gift you gave us, well we still have it and the smiles on their faces and the memories we made for them are priceless. Some of our siblings return to their birth families, but they still stay in touch and have a lovely relationship. This wouldn’t happen if they weren’t together.”
Sharon & John – Wrexham Foster Carers
If you have the room and time to provide siblings with a safe, secure & loving family environment, please get in touch
fostering siblings and why it’s important by Carol Lilley
I have been a qualified social worker since 1991, my experience is in child protection, child and family work and fostering, I have attended court on many occasions and have been a participant in delivering training and project work.
I have worked in the Wrexham fostering team for nearly three years in the role of assistant team manager; I am committed to Wrexham as I feel they are on a journey of improving the all-round services they deliver to children and their families. All the people I communicate with on a daily basis are dedicated to the families of Wrexham and we are encouraged by the senior management team to feel part of this journey of doing our best for the future needs of the community.
As well as supporting the foster carers of Wrexham and being the Fostering Panel Advisor, I am actively involved with the recruitment of new foster carers for Wrexham, I feel passionate about providing professional, understanding and caring people to care for the children and young people of Wrexham. This passion is driven by enabling the children and young people to remain in Wrexham which is their home and their culture when they cannot live at home with their families.
Carol M Lilley
